How to Forgive and Let Go
We all experience hurt, pain and anger at some point in life, but so many of us carry around that hurt instead of letting it go. At times, it can feel like we’ve been carrying around all of our grudges forever. There are some things we just feel are unforgivable.
But there is tremendous power in forgiveness. When we give it, we feel as if a weight has been lifted off our shoulders. We are free.
Tapping is a practice that can help us learn how to forgive. As we change our thought patterns and begin healing from the past, forgiveness becomes a natural part of the process.
As we continue on our journeys and on the path to forgiveness, we open the door to so many beautiful things.
How to Forgive Yourself or Someone who Has Hurt You in 14 Steps
Forgiving the person who hurt you or yourself is crucial for spiritual growth. Your past experience with somebody who has hurt you may still be painful, but it is nothing more than a thought that you carry around. These hurt feelings of anger, hatred, or resentment represent draining energies that will disempower you if you let them take over you.
To find peace, you need to release these negative thoughts and learn how to forgive. Follow these 14 steps to forgive somebody who has hurt you.
- Move on from the past. Your history and all of the past hurts don’t matter anymore. Don’t let them take over your mind and make you feel bad, distracting you from the beauty of the present moment. Embrace your past and move on with your life.
- Don’t go to sleep sad or angry. The time when you are drifting off to sleep is the most precious time of the day. Do not let your anger or feelings of guilt take over yourself and make you immersed into that feeling for the hours of sleep.
- Stop blaming others and start understanding yourself. Whenever somebody makes you upset, take the focus away from them. Instead, shift your mental focus on allowing yourself to feel whatever that is you’re feeling. Let the experience be the way it is, without blaming others for making you feel this way.
- Don’t tell others what to do. Avoid telling people who are able to make their own decisions what to do or expecting them to feel guilty. Remember that you do not own anyone, and every person has the right to make their own choices.
- Learn to let go. Rather than trying to dominate others, learn to be like water: flow wherever you see an opening. Become more tolerant to opinions of others, interfere less, and be more open to other points of view.
- Take responsibility for yourself. Blaming other people means that you never take responsibility for what you are going through. Take responsibility for your hurtful experiences, and you will be able to also take responsibility for learning how to forgive and remove them from your life.
- Choose to be kind instead of right. The world is the way it is. There is nothing you can change about it, except the way you react. If somebody says something offensive to you, you don’t have to engage in an argument! Instead, accept their words and forgive them.
- Practice giving. When you argue with someone, practice giving instead of taking. Giving forgiveness means leaving your ego behind and responding to hate with love, to darkness with light, and to injury - with pardon. When you are ready to forgive, shame and guilt will step aside, freeing the way for more positive emotions.
- Stop looking for opportunities to feel offended. Many people spend huge amounts of time trying to find opportunities to be offended. A rude stranger, a news report, a sneeze, a bad person, anything… Becoming a person who refuses to be offended and taking power into your own hands feels good and is beneficial for both your mental health and physical health.
- Leave the past behind. If it is difficult to understand how to forgive someone, it means that we are still living in the past, ignoring the present. Take the energy and attention away from what has happened already and re-focus on what is happening today.
- Avoid judgement. If you become an observer rather than actively judging others, you will finally find the inner peace. And with this feeling of inner peace, you will become happier, find true forgiveness, and move on.
- Spread love. Instead of judgements and criticisms, spread love around! If you feel like others impede with your happiness and joy, change the way you look at things. When you give love and forgiveness, you will receive love in return.
Why We Need to Find Forgiveness
When we learn how to forgive and find the power for forgiveness within ourselves, our lives change for the best:
We Find Peace
Forgiveness isn’t about reconciliation. It’s about giving ourselves peace of mind. We let go of our feelings of anger, hate, sadness or resentment. The person who hurt us may no longer have a place in our lives – even after forgiveness – but we have peace in our hearts.
Once we’ve forgiven, we can finally move on.
We Open a New Door
Sometimes, our anger and hurt can keep us stuck in the past unable to move forward. When we offer forgiveness, we close one door and open a new one.
In that moment of forgiveness, we turn to a fresh page and are able to start living life again.
We Live Life to the Fullest
When we offer forgiveness, we let go of the control that person has over us. We are free to live our lives to the fullest.
The best thing you can do for your health and happiness is live life on your terms and without the weight of past wrongdoings holding you back.
We Find it Easier to Forgive in the Future
Hate and anger are like poisons. These emotions are unproductive, and they do nothing but hurt us. The person who wronged us is going about their lives completely unaffected. Meanwhile, our minds are consumed by the fact that they have wronged us.
Once we realize the freedom of genuine forgiveness, it becomes easier to extend it in the future.
We Don’t Expect Things from Others
In many cases, hurt and anger are derived from our expectations of others. And then when they wrong us, we expect them to come crawling back, groveling at our feet.
When we learn to forgive, we also learn to lower or eliminate our expectations of others. We realize that no one is perfect, and people will not always behave the way we want them to. When we have no expectations, we find ourselves not needing to forgive because we don’t feel wronged by other people’s actions.
Learn How to Forgive and Forget with Hypnosis Tapping Meditation
Forgiveness opens the door to freedom. Tapping can help us learn how to forgive. With each session, we learn to let go a little bit more and allow the past to stay in the past. It’s not an easy process, but it’s a worthwhile one. With forgiveness, we can finally enjoy lasting peace.