How To Love Someone Without Attachment
Attachment is engrained in our society. We’re attached to the things we own. We’re attached to our friends and family. But most importantly – and most painfully – we are attached to the people we are in love with.
We mistake attachment for loving and caring for someone. We can’t live without them. They are ours, and we are theirs.
But at the end of the day, attachment is a form of possession. Do you really want to own your partner?
Practicing non-attachment can help you enjoy healthier relationships – romantic and otherwise. It is time to learn how to love someone without attachment.
Love Without Attachment
Loving somebody without developing some sort of attachment or dependence on them is not easy.
Most of us are used to loving others with conditions. We want our loved ones to adjust to us. We want them to soothe our loneliness and fill the emptiness. We expect them to give us wings to fly and fix our broken parts.
We want it all at the same time but often forget about the most important part: starting with ourselves.
Nobody is responsible for saving you. Nobody has to rebuild your life. However, we are used to giving over to our partners in hope that they will make us feel complete. We expect them to meet our needs instead of learning how to love someone without attachment.
Don’t Let Society Determine Your Needs
Most of the time, this type of emotional and psychological dynamic is due to the type of society we grew up in. From a very young age, our culture communicates that happiness is synonymous with owning things.
This leads us to a distressing emotional reality: it makes us feel as we are always missing something.
The result? Our entire existence is built around the idea of accumulating things in hope that they will make us feel good. We develop an obsessive attachment to ideas, things, and people. We believe that we can give our lives more meaning by doing so.
This type of emotional attachment is detrimental. It can make you captive to whatever it is you think you need. You start being attached to things and people not because you actually need them, but due to an emotional and social impulse. It is a blind mechanism that can lead you to suffering and fear.
Is this kind of life worth it? Definitely not. Realizing this will help you build healthier relationships. In addition, you will live a happier and more satisfying life.
Love is Understanding How Life Works
To learn to love without attachment, we have to understand two truths in our heart:
- We will unavoidably lose everything we cherish at some point.
- Life’s fragility is what makes each relationship more precious.
Too frequently we focus on the second point and deny the first one. We feed anxieties and fears around the idea of losing our partner or their leaving us. We don’t let ourselves enjoy the full potential for happiness.
The main difference between healthy unconditional love and an attachment is whether you can step back and allow spaciousness, composure, and caring.
How to Love Without Attachment or Anxiety
Loving that is not based on needs means loving your partner just the way they are, not how you wish they were.
It is loving the other person unconditionally like you love the moon, the sun, and the stars. You don’t own them, nor would you want to own them. Yet, you appreciate that they are there every single day, inspiring you, giving you light and accompanying you on your journey. The fact that you don’t own them doesn’t mean that you can’t love them.
Let’s take a look at some strategies of how to love someone without attachment.
Understand and Accept That Nothing is Permanent
The only guarantee in life is that things will change. Nothing is permanent. The phrase “this too shall pass” applies to both the good and bad moments we experience.
Many of us grow to be so attached to the things we own and our lovers, we think they will be around forever. But things can change in the blink of an eye.
The sooner we understand and accept that nothing is permanent, the sooner we can find joy in the uncertainties of life and embrace change.
Allow and Accept Things as They Are
Practice that art of allowing and acceptance. Allow life to be as it is. Allow and accept your thoughts and emotions. If things don’t go as planned, go with the flow.
Allowing means permitting life to be as it is without wanting to change, fix or judge things. Instead of allowing your emotions and judgements to rule you, you allow your emotions to guide you towards happiness and feeling better.
Use Energy Release Techniques
Energy releasing methods like Tapping Therapy is a great solution and can help us learn how to love someone without attachment. Tapping for stress can ease the frustration we face when trying to let go of attachment. Tapping for anxiety can help ease the fear we have of loss.
Energy releasing techniques can be powerful and effective for both letting go of attachments and healing from emotional trauma we may be holding onto.
Tapping can help calm your nervous system and give your mind the chance to rest. When our minds are calm and quiet, it’s much easier to see things for what they are and to accept them without judgement, fear or stress.
Look Within for Happiness
We often look for happiness in all of the wrong places. We think money and material things will bring us happiness. We think that our relationships will bring us happiness. But we often find that our joy is short-lived.
The truth is that happiness can only be found within. Only you have the power to make yourself happy. When you place your expectations of happiness on someone else – like your partner – you are practicing attachment.
By taking control of your own happiness, you are practicing non-attachment.
Love with Non-Attachment with Hypnosis Tapping
Non-attachment doesn’t come naturally to most of us. It takes time and dedication to work on letting go of attachments and embracing freedom. These methods can help you learn how to love someone without attachment and enjoy happy, healthy relationships where everyone has the freedom to grow and change.